Holiday Time

Where did you grow up? If it's anywhere within 10 hours driving of Holland, it's likely that you encountered enormous convoys of Dutch camper vans marauding through the countryside during the Summer. Dutch people are different when it comes to taking holidays. The key aim of a holiday is to spend as little as possible. No possible economy is overlooked. Fripperies such as airplane flights, taxis, hotels, restaurants, shops and showers are scorned. Instead, a van is packed up with (1) a tent; (2) 7 herring sandwiches for every adult for every day of the holiday; (3) copies of whatever paper could be retrieved from the local recycling bin (this will function as reading material, toilet paper, make up remover and insulation); (4) an empty bottle of Spa Blauw (to refill at canals and rivers); and (5) an ancient, disposable barbecue which Dutch people will use to cook any non-herring food scraps they find along the way.

Under no circumstances will a Dutch person vary from this routine. The consequences for them are unimaginable. Ask your local tourist office representative.